I am a sucker for cat video, but this may just be the best cat video ever.
(I got it from Digg.)
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From the monthly archives:
January 2007
Thanks to Kottke, here’s the link to turn off those insanely annoying Snap previews that are showing up on far too many web sites. This link sets a cookie that will turn them off for all sites, forever. Forever. Gone. Thank you.
I’d like to send a really big box of crap to every web site owner who thinks installing this pustulant visual intrusion is a good idea. Stop it. Just stop.
(I got it from Kottke.)
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You might want to be sitting down for this.
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.
“Miss Whack, I’d like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday,” said the frog.
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it’s okay, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says, “Sure. I have this,” and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, bright pink, and about an inch tall.
Very confused, Patty explains that she’ll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says, “There’s a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral.”
She holds up the tiny pink elephant. “I mean, what in the world is this?”
The bank manager looks back at her and says, “It’s a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”
(I got it from Cliff Johnson)
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A couple of weeks back Eric got the flu. His whole company has it. The whole valley has it. This is an especially ugly flu, a wide-spectrum flu, a flu that touches all corners of the misery box. Its an advertising flu: a Sniffling Sneezing Coughing Aching Stuffy Head Fever flu.
Especially unluckily for Eric, he got it over a weekend. His flu was precisely bracketed by the time he got home from work on friday to the time he got up monday morning to go back to work. So on top of everything else it’s also a flu with a cruel sense of humor.
I’ve been feeling pretty smug about all this because I got a flu shot this year. In fact, I’ve been getting flu shots for a bunch of years now and I’ve effectively stopped getting sick. Eric: no flu shots; he gets sick every year. I smugly held this up as proof that the flu shot works, and I smugly paraded my sunny health annoyingly about the house as Eric suffered. Yup, I was really smug about it. Flu shots are great, thought I. I’m so damn healthy, thought I. Smug smug smug.
And then last tuesday the flu came down from the sky and humorlessly squashed all the smug right out of me.
I should note here that I am using “flu” generically. I don’t think either of us ever actually had the actual flu. I never ran a fever, although it felt like I was. I think this was just a really bloody nasty awful headcold. But damn, what a vicious terror of a headcold it was.
For five days I did nothing but take nyquil and sleep. I have only one clear memory of those five days: One night I stared fascinatedly at the TiVo as Eric was clicking through the screens, because the menus were coming apart and floating around about a foot in front of the TV. “Are you OK?” Eric asked me. “I am so stoned.” I commented insightfully. Obviously I am not going to be writing the nyquil-induced kubla khan any time soon.
Interesting fact I learned during my sickness: You know the nyquil slogan I quoted above, the Sniffling Sneezing Coughing Aching Stuffy Head Fever So-You-Can-Rest thing? They’ve changed it. The stuffy head part is gone. I stared at the box for a long time thinking “where’s the stuffy head part?” and then I realized….maybe they took the stuffy head drug out.
Sure enough, thanks to the Combat Methamphetamine Epidemic Act of 2005, part of the US Patriot act, it is now illegal to purchase pseudoephedrine, aka sudafed, over the counter (psuedoephedrine is a decongestant). You have to request it from a locked cabinet behind the counter, you have to produce photo ID, and you have to be logged and tracked by the pharmacist to make sure you don’t buy too much of it in any 30 day period.
I feel so much safer now.
Drug manufacturers, thinking that perhaps people might be annoyed by the rigmarole, have been reformulating all the OTC drugs they sell that used to contain pseudoephedrine to, not. Thus: nyquil no longer contains it. Nyquil is no longer the wonder kill-all cold and flu solution it once was. Fortunately I have a big box of pre-ban generic sudafed and once I figured out what was going on I just popped some with my green death every day. And all was right with the world, well, other than the wondrous flying TiVo menus.
Yesterday I finally started to feel a little bit human (better than slime mold, but not quite primate). Today I am about 40% human (approaching neanderthal). I am aiming for perhaps 75% human tomorrow. One step at a time. Notable is that it has taken me three days to write this post.
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“They’re Made Out of Meat“, Terry Bisson’s famous short story from Omni in 1991. Great stuff.
(I got it from Not Always On.)
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